I was travelling with my friend in a car. She was browsing through her Facebook. She came across a picture of a woman in Saree. She showed it to me saying, “the way you Indian’s drape a Saree is so revealing. It shows your back and your waist.” I was not very happy with her comment. I felt she was insulting my traditional attire and wanted to counter her. So, I replied saying, “according to me even I feel that your clothes are revealing as it shows your legs.” Years passed by. Now when I think of that conversation, I realize, both our cultures are very patriarchal. They objectified bodies of women and tell us which body part is moral to be revealed and which should not be revealed. This objectification of the body sadly begins in the family and cemented by the Church.
There was an activity which was carried out among the youths of a Church. They were asked to have a good look at themselves and then write a few lines describing themselves in relation to what they have heard about body in the church. Most of the young boys wrote, “The person in the mirror is a man and he is made in the image of God. The man in the mirror is fearfully and wonderfully made.” The girls though had a different story to tell, “The person in the mirror is a woman. She has gone through lot of difficulties, because as a woman she was told that she would not be able to do many things. In relation to her body she was told to dress properly so that she should not distract men.”
No sooner, when the girl attains puberty she is told how to sit, how to stand, how to laugh and most importantly how to dress. The main topic during Confirmation classes, mostly revolve around how one must be dressed for church. Women are made extra mindful of their dressing. They are told that they should be properly dressed as they should not distract the men. They are not told this directly but are told in a subtle way like, the Church is the Holy dwelling place of God and it must be respected. What is the logic? I never understood. I would often think, “If it was actually through clothes that humans were supposed to give God glory, God would have created human beings with clothes. Does not the word of God tell us that God looks at our heart?”
Remember:
When we tell our girls to dress properly, we make them internalize that they are objects of seduction.
When we tell girls to dress properly, we make them believe it is fine for men to disrespect them.
When we tell girls to dress properly, we shame their beautiful bodies God created.
When we tell girls to dress properly, we teach our boys that women's bodies can be abused.
When we tell girls to dress properly, we tell our boys the bodies of woman are properties of men.
When we tell our girls to dress properly, we instruct our boys that the character of woman should be judged by the length of her clothes.
When we tell our girls to dress properly, we inscribe in their hearts, their bodies are dirty.
As a community of faith, it is required of us to be responsible for the well-being of each other. With all the violence that is perpetrated over bodies of women, let the words of Jesus in the Gospel of Matthew 5: 27-28 remind all of us, especially men, “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
Prayer
God of love pardon us for what we have indirectly told our girls. Instead of teaching our boys, we made the girls/women feel they are nothing but object. Guide us further to correct all our teachings so that we treat our children as equals for you, O God, have created us. In Jesus name. Amen.
Author: Anonymous
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete